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LETTERS ABOUT ROAD SAFETY IN SAN JUAN COUNTY |
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Response to letter about roadside crossesDear Editor, posted 08/14/04
Most of us do turn away from our focus of attention to take a moment to remember a human being that was taken from earth too soon. Hey, some of us even do get 1.anxious and worried at the sight of a memorial. Anxiety is what us humans feel when we don't quite know how to get through each passing day without a loved one...worried about other family and friends who are feeling anxiety as well. Distracting also meaning 2.crazed:insane. I'm not quite sure which distracting you were referring to but I'm inclined to think it was the latter! Crazed, insane is what your letter was. Golly, don't you just worry sick about those dangerous stop signs, road markers, deer and the occasional stray cow? All of which could just pop right out and injure, possibly kill you at any given time. When you are ready to return to the "concrete jungle," where street lights dangle from above (posing no immediate danger to you)-Home of the neatly laid out freeway with no pesky street signs and roadside memorials to distract you, give me a call...I'll help you pack! Enjoy your time on San Juan Island - Consider this my "Welcome" P.S To all of you who have lost a loved one, no matter the reason, love and hugs to all of you...Yes, even you Ms. Farrar. Jana DeFreece Dear Editor, posted 08/14/04
Jana DeFreece Dear Editor, posted 08/04/04
I did not know Matt personally but I can tell you how he left a mark on my life. His mark is on the side of the road just outside of town. You see a few days after this terrible accident happened my 9 year old daughter asked what the cross was for. When I responded that it was one of her best friend's uncles and that he died there she asked me "How?" This opened the door and Marissa and I had a very long and productive conversation about speeding, drinking and the responsibility of driving. Just the other day we were driving again and her 5 year old sister pointed it out and Marissa very reverently explained that it was for her friend's uncle and the two of them had their talk about how he died. There were no judgements made by the girls - just a humbled conversation. They were remebering a man they didn't even know but even they had the compassion in their hearts to respect his life. I can remember thinking of how proud I was of them at that moment. Again I did know Matt but I thank whoever placed that cross there and I think of the life it symbolizes. I can gurantee you that it has opened the door for many other parents to talk with their kids and if its presence does nothing else it humbles us. I can only hope he can start doing the same for you Jennifer. My best regards to all. Tiar Black Dear Editor, posted 07/20/04
Apparently, she shouldn't take a drink, either, because she wouldn't be able to control the impulse to get plastered and kill herself just to be a "hero." I have never read such an incredibly STUPID letter in my life! I would certainly be chagrined and sad if I were a family member of hers- to know that she would shun and be ashamed of me if I were to make a bad choice. OOPS- wait- HER LETTER was a BAD CHOICE! I sure hope her family has the unconditional love and compassion to forgive her and continue to love her inspite of her stupidity and thoughtlessness. It's obvious to me that Ms. Farrar shouldn't be living in a tight-knit rural community with 2-lane roads that don't have concrete barriers between or on each side of them...she certainly has created those barriers around herself. To Matt, Mark, Terry, and Ryan: You were and are loved. You are remembered- always. Whenever I drive by one of your memorials, it's a reminder of all good things we have loved and lost- by bad choice or otherwise. Ryan's premature death was the direct result of a very bad choice that an acquaintance of his made...and I know that the family of the person that made that unfortunate choice still love that person unconditionally, have great compassion for all involved, and know there are lessons to be learned along every road we travel in life. Ms. Farrar needs to drive (very carefully!) straight to Oz and get a heart, brain, and some courage to face this life. Margaret Bell Dear Editor, posted 07/15/04
First and foremost, I think most people would agree with me when I say that a person's life is not defined by the manner of their death, even when it is due to their own choices, however tragic those choices may be. There is SO much more to a life than those final minutes leading to death. Once upon a time, Matt was an infant, a toddler learning to walk and talk, a little boy playing and laughing and walking to school, a brother, someone's friend and confidant, a husband, a father to an amazing little girl, and so much more than you will ever know. This is not to say that he was perfect by any means. Who among us on this great Earth can say they are? Certainly I believe if Matt had survived his accident, the people who love him would have expressed their disappointment in his actions, but as all people who love someone unconditionally, they would continue to love him then as they do now. Without excusing the unfortunate behavior that sometimes comes from the consumption of too much alcohol, as someone who has been touched by the effects of alcholism, I have first-hand knowledge that sometimes wonderful people do things that are harmful to themselves and the people they care about, things they would not have done if they were sober. I am not making a judgment about Matt's relationship to alcohol and NEVER would OR could...only he knows where he stood in that regard. Whatever the case, Matt's actions on the night of his unfortunate death do not make his life any less valuable. Having gone to college in the state of Montana, where on any country road or highway there are scores of these white cross memorials lining the roadside, I have always seen them as a wake-up call. I never knew the deceased, but I knew that they were markers of people who died driving on the very road on which I was now traveling. As far as I'm concerned, they are better than any municipal speed-limit signs or reminders not to drink and drive. Even as symbols the crosses bear a stark reality because they stand for someone who was once a living and breathing human being. The people who are going to drink and drive and speed on San Juan Island are going to do so for a great many reasons, reasons too great in number to discuss here, but not because they see Matt McCutcheon's memorial and think..Wow, what a cool way to die! I'm going to do what he did! C'mon, let's go! As for your assertion that Matt's memorial is a roadside hazard...I can see not one bit of logic there, though I do wonder about the reasons for your preoccupation with it. Ms. Farrar, I ask you, please turn to another cause in need of your attention. Those of us who knew and loved Matt will continue to celebrate his life and honor the wonderful person he was, giving him a little wave when we drive by, even if you choose not to do so. Marlis Krieger Sandwith Dear Editor, posted 07/15/04
It does not matter how they died, what they did in their life or who they were. It is a symbol to caution others of a potentially dangerous area and a way to help the family mourn. Jennifer, you have chosen to live on an island where island folks love each other for being part of the community. You obviously did not know this person or have any sort of roots on this island or you would have never even thought about writing such a mean spirited, self diestructive letter. Good luck making friends around here, you just ticked off half of your community! Angie Krieger Dear Editor, posted 07/13/04
As I read through your words Jennifer, tears began streaming down my face, more and more the further I read. You said "I do not seek to wound or hurt the family and friends of the young man who died," well I am here to let you know you did just that. You reached into my chest, grabbed my heart and tore it out. All I could ask myself is what type of a person could write these sentences about someone's deceased family member whom they never had the pleasure of knowing"? And "Who could post this thoughtless letter the day after the anniversary of the accident knowing that his family and friends are trying to cope with the loss?" Sitting here writing this response I am really trying to hold in a lot of anger your letter planted inside me. I am tring to keep a clear head about this situation cause the truth is there is no justification for your words. Just as the other responses have stated, my cousin's cross is a symbol of love toward the loss of an incredible person. Everyone is allowed their point of view buy yours blows my mind. How anyone could take my cousin's memorial as the McCutcheon family trying to commemorate him as a hero for losing his life in an alcohol related accident is beyond my comprehension. Also, please excuse me for my rude comment buy your final sentence may be one of the stupidest things I have ever read in my life. If you think the youth of the Island would actively take the "invitation" to "get drunk, drive, and kill themselves" to be remembered as heros then it is my opinion that you are not a very intelligent individual. It is true that everyone makes mistakes and I believe you posted one of your mistakes on this website on July 8, 2004. I would like to thank Meghan Robinson, Bernadette Mason_Ebanks, Deanna Banry, Rynnie Wilson, Jenny Moore, and everyone else who continues to support Matthew's family and friends through the tough times we continue to experience. Matthew was an incredible family member, friend, husband, and father. We love you Matt and we will never forget who you were. Ken McCutcheon Jr. Dear Editor, posted 07/13/04
Patricia McKay Dear Editor, posted 07/13/04
This cross was erected to commemorate a young man who was killed by making a choice that forever changed many lives. Perhaps Miss Jennifer Farrar, has not spent much time off this island, but there are crosses erected all over this country to remember loved ones. The message is not to say "HEY! JUDGE ME." It seems quite ignorant to make such a comment. I have news for Jennifer. Matthew was and still is a hero. Maybe not to you, because you didn't know him. But to his daughter, my daughter and anyone who knew him, he will always be a hero. Not for what happened, but for the beautiful person that he was. You can criticize, and say lack of self control? Who are you to judge? I am sure there has been a time... It is extremely disturbing that you would be shamed of one of your own family members, should they do something that "you" don't approve of. WOW. Once again ignorance comes to mind. What kind of message are we sending to our youth? That we love our family no matter what. It is not for us to judge other peoples choices, but to support one another. I just have to add one more thing...In your second sentence, In your words "if a driver swung too far out..." Maybe they should pay more attention to their driving don't you think? And that would be their fault now wouldn't it if they were driving recklessly. Maybe you could move on and go judge them now. There is no safety hazard, there is no negative message, besides the one that you have written. Janeen Jennings Dear Editor, posted 07/09/04
Bernadette Mason_Ebanks Dear Editor, posted 07/09/04
Deanna Banry Dear Editor, posted 07/08/04
Rynnie Wilson Dear Editor, posted 07/08/04
He is missed and loved every day since we lost him. I have driven by the cross with my teenage daughters and thought about Matt and how much I miss him. It has given me the oportunity to talk with them about the consequences of making bad choices. I wish that Jennifer Farrar would have stopped to consider that the cross might not be a safety hazzard but a reminder to all the young people on San Juan Island to slow down and be a little more careful. And for the record, Matt was a hero to all of us that knew him, not because of how he was taken from us, but because he was a good man, a good friend, a hard worker and a great dad. I say keep that cross on Roche Harbor road, keep the cross on Bailer Hill for Ryan Lobue and let anyone put a cross up anywhere at anytime to help them and all of us with coping with our loss and to help us to all remember to make the best choices possible. Jenny Moore Dear Editor, posted 07/08/04
What I see when a pass his cross is a reminder that he was a husband, a father, a brother, and a son. How dare you trample on his memory because of a terrible thing that happened. Tell me Jennifer, you have never had a beer and then gone somewhere, never talked on a cell phone while driving, put lipstick on? We all make bad calls. What makes you so perfect? He was a good man and a wonderful father. Have you ever lost anyone, were they perfect? If not you will and you will want a memory that is positive no matter what mistakes that person has made in life. The cross is not a road hazard it is a reminder that life is so short and that we should live every day like it might be the last. To love one another no matter what mistakes they had made. Please don't judge others especially ones you never knew. Meghan Robinson Concerned about crossDear Editor, posted 07/08/04
This cross is a safety hazard, not only is it a distraction, which could cause an accident, but if a driver swung too far out, the cross would probably snap and be thrust through the windshield perhaps killing someone. This cross is also erected to commemorate a young man who killed himself by drinking and driving, and speeding. That alone sends the wrong message to the community, it honors and commemorates kids who get drunk and drive and behave irresponsibly. I am surprised and chagrined that the Sherrif has allowed the cross to remain erected, considering its safety hazard and symbology (wrong message). I'm also surprised that the BOCC allows such inappropriate public displays and distractive commemorations. I do not seek to wound or hurt the family and friends of the young man who died there, but he was not a hero, and his death was not heroic but yet another tragedy of intemperance and lack of self control. From a personal point of view, I would not like to commemorate or erect a reminder, especially one with a religious significance, at the site of such a tragedy, if such involved a member of my own family. In fact I would be shamed to even acknowledge that my son or brother or friend had died because he was drunk and driving at a speed of 70 mph on a curve with a speed limit of 35 mph. What kind of message are we sending to our youth. Get drunk, drive kill yourself and you will be memoralized as a hero? That's an invitation that a lot of youth, just might take up. Jennifer Farrar Response to Shannon: time to discuss scenic vs safeDear Editor, posted 11/01/03 Jeff Seitz Dear Editor, posted 10/14/03 Really stupid people will try to pass anywhere, but normal people have figured out several good spots to pass on every wide road in the county, especially Horseshoe Highway and Roche harbor Road. When I worked for the county, and changes to the West Side Road on San Juan Island were proposed, Public Works said that a key element in working with a narrow road is to not put a centerline on it, as that will cause people to stay to the sides, which on a narrow road makes them slow down. Not knowing where the center of the road is makes you uncomfortable, and a little more cautious, theoretically. San Juan County has always argued that it is different. Give a road engineer a chance, and he'll build to state and federal standards, as the designs have all been figured out, for safety at speed. I'm sure it would be cheaper to put some sort of electronic gizmo on every car to limit its top speed than it would be to rip up the county for wider roads. Bob Querry Reaction to "Quality of life" trumps road safetyDear Editor, posted 09/22/03
Sammy Long Dear Editor, posted 09/20/03
I can't fight that, as I have no cards to play. (I did go confront him on this issue, and he smiled as he stonewalled me.) I do Know that I have more sense than he, and have had an engineers licence (probably) longer (1960) than he. And so goes life on SJI, and I'm glad it isn't like the mainland! Charlie Ratcliffe Reaction to Neighbors object to stripes on roadDear Editor, posted 09/11/03
The hearing was another island joke. None of the protesters were allowed to speak or state their case. It is amazing to me to hear that Mr. Rasmussen on the afternoon before the next day's meeting, found the four people that were for the striping when all other (25?) were missed. The only person I saw him talking to was the petitioner. Compassion? Does this person have a night vision problem? This striping will make the road less safe because of its width and reduced clearences of the trees. The large trucks and vehicles will have more problems. Just watch the sheriff's log for the next year. Herb Cuniff EDITOR'S NOTE: Residents were allowed to speak at the meeting. Rasmussen did not meet the petitioner until the hearing. The width of the road is 22-feet, the same width of Cattle Point Road between Little and Portland Fair Road. Dear Editor, posted 09/11/03
Cindy Springer |
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